Can This Week Be Over?

Le sigh.

What a week.

And it's not even over yet.

My sensitive and melancholy nature have taken over big time lately.

I had a long post post detailing my craptastic week, but I don't want it to sound like one of those old country songs. You know "Ooooooh, my wife left me and my dog ran away and my pickup truck done broke down on me and my bes' frien' stole my fishin' pole!"

But here are two noteworthy complaints:

I haven't watched Dr. Who in 4 DAYS!

I so badly want to look up Dr. Who stuff but I'm paranoid of spoilers. I have to be extremely careful when I see people post Dr. Who stuff on their facebook walls. Today I saw one and glanced only a second at it because I knew it was probably something important. It was Dr. Who with a bunch of people in front of the TARDIS using the same font and words as the TV show "How I Met Your Mother."

What the heck does THAT mean?! AHHHH!!! I want to watch all the Dr. Whos!!!

*PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE don't spoil anything for me. If you do, I will hunt you down and give you a stern talking to. I'll do it! Don't you think I won't!*

Aaaaaand I ran out of chocolate.

The Last Three Pieces

There they are... my chemistry notes are their funeral pyre.

Yes, I do my homework on the floor. I have a lot of distractions as you can see...

I spend about 75% of the time watching Sam scoot around. The rest is divided between homework and facebook.

I swear he's going to take off crawling any day now...

Oh, and every 15 minutes I have to go put Joe back down to his nap. He hasn't been napping at all lately. It's been super duper. That's added to the wonderfulness of the week.

Although it's been easy to entertain him lately. My sister in law got this beautiful canvas picture for me. Joe thinks it's "toot" which is his way of saying cute.

The week is almost over thank goodness. Hopefully this weekend will get me recharged and ready to take on some of the challenges that have been thrown my way.

Well this post is pretty darn random. Let's add to the randomness shall we?!

Here is a video that we took of Ryan rubbing his eye last night. Turn up the volume and hear the freaky noises coming from his head! He's a cyborg for sure!

Moving is Hell

Moving sucks. While I am very glad to have our own place, I HATE unpacking and organizing and finding a place for everything. Plus, I've had no internet service so I feel like a pioneer woman who should be churning butter or something!

Joe is NOT adjusting well to the move. At all. It's been hell here. It's been quite an adjustment for me as well. Doesn't quite feel like "home" yet and I hate that!

Yesterday Ryan and I decided to take a break and relax and go see The Hunger Games in theaters. I'm such a dumb@ss thinking that watching that movie would cause my tension to go away. I've read the books- I knew it wouldn't be like watching a rom-com or something stupid. I got back to our apartment even more anxious than I was when we left.

But we find out the gender of this little knucklehead floating inside me on Wednesday! That gives me something to look forward to!

I just wanted to interrupt this blog silence with some randomness. Have a good day!

Weekend Recap.. a few days late!

I had a big post ready to recap our very busy weekend. I uploaded a bunch of photos on here in what I THOUGHT was chronological order, but when they appeared on this page they were all out of order. I don't know what I'm doing wrong. Anywho, here's a small recap of Joe's party weekend:

We had a small family party on his actual birthday which was Friday. He had a cupcake and really seemed to enjoy it!

This is Joe on his big party day with his own cake. He really seemed to like this as well!

A family snapshot after the party!

Our weekend was super busy! On Friday after the little party we went to the Kansas City Irish Fest. I enjoyed some nice tall cups of beer there! It's been awhile since I've had a few!

Saturday we had a family wedding and we had a great time!

Sunday was Joe's big party. It was wonderful! Joe LOVES Sesame Street so that was the party theme and I did not hold back in decorating. Party City has TONS of super cute 1st birthday Sesame Street themed decorations so I went hog-wild. At least I didn't buy a life-size stand up Elmo balloon like my hubby did! Joe was awesome during the party! Since Joe doesn't eat table food yet I was worried he wouldn't be interested in the cake. Boy, did he prove me wrong!

On Monday the weather was PERFECT so we took Joe on his first trip to the zoo! It was kind of crowded, but we had a good time. Joe was terrified of the llamas and the birds, but loved the elephants and hippos!

This weekend was so busy but so wonderful! All the eating and drinking caught up with me, however; I gained 0.6 of a lb at Weight Watchers tonight. I was actually pleased because I thought I would have gained a lot more! Only 4 more lbs now to my goal weight!

Hopefully I get Blogger figured out someday. I still don't know how to schedule my posts or put photos in order or hyperlink photos. Oh well!

Hope your weekend was fantastic!

A Mish Mash

I have a whole lot to write and not enough time to write it! I'm working on my third and final part of my series. It will focus on how difficult it was for me to bond with my son, the challenges of new mommyhood, and thinking about baby #2.

It's NFP Awareness Week! The Catholic blogosphere is bursting with all sorts of NFP posts! I wanted to write about how different NFP is after having a baby. But all I can really say is that now there are a lot less check marks in that special coitus box on my chart than there is before Joe was born, and Ryan and I are totally OK with that! :-)

I weighed in at WW yesterday. I lost 4.4 lbs! So far that I've lost 16.4 lbs and am at 130.2 lbs. I'm now below pre-pregnancy weight an it feels pretty good!

I'm also in the process of writing a post about photographs. Do you scrapbook, do photo books, print them off and put them in albums? I'm conflicted. :-)

On a sad note, please pray for one of my college professors. His newborn son passed away after a premature birth (at 23 weeks, I believe) but by the grace of God was able to receive baptism before he took his last breath. This professor is a very good and holy man who embraces his Catholic faith and does a darn good job at teaching it. I'm pretty sure he could be a saint someday. Please pray for him and his family.

That's all, folks! I have a very ornery almost 11 month old who is causing havoc! Must go chase!

When Barges Attack!

How was your weekend?

Mine was pretty exciting. Well, as exciting as this teeny tiny town will allow!

We spent Saturday evening waiting for a runaway barge to pass by on the Missouri River.

I kid you not, folks!

We went to Saturday night Mass in a town about 10 miles north of us. We have to cross the Missouri River to get there. After Mass Ryan ran into the store to get a few groceries and heard that a runaway barge had struck a bridge about 30 miles away. Yikes, we thought. We prayed no one was hurt.

As we drove back home and approached the bridge over the river we noticed highway patrolmen and our town's volunteer firefighters on the bridge with their lights flashing. They were standing by their cars looking at the river. We wondered what the heck was going on! We turned on our local country station and they informed us that the barge was still on the loose and heading toward the bridge we had just crossed over. The police were there so when/if they spotted the barge they could stop traffic because if that sucker hit the bridge it would be bad news.

We drove to where there's a little lot by the river and of course tons of people were there. We were all waiting to see the barge and to see if it would crash into the bridge. Some of Ryan's co-workers were there and we had a good time visiting.

We stood around chatting with other people from the town, listened to country music, had a beer, watched as someone built a bonfire (it was getting dark and cold), and watched the river. That might sound totally redneck, but I had an awesome time!

We stayed there for about an hour. We got news that the barge had been located on a sandbar. Our town's mighty bridge was safe to stand another day!

I had to get a picture of the bridge in case it was destroyed.

Waiting for the barge. Even though we didn't get to see it we got a spectacular sunset. God is so awesome! Drinking the one beer made me so incredibly tired even though I had drank a Dr. Pepper late in the day. I usually never have caffeine after 2:00 p.m. I suddenly remembered why I don't drink it late in the day when my son was bouncing off the walls at 9:55 p.m. that night! (Note the clock in the background!)

It is the simple things in life that make me happy. Like barges, beer and baby smiles.

And in case you don't believe me about the runaway barge, here is the proof!

Wondering Wednesdays Vol. 19: The News

Today I am wondering why I bother watching the news. It's so depressing.

I never really grew up watching the news, except for maybe the morning news shows before I went to school. But the last couple of years Ryan and I watch the news nearly every night. Before I had Joe I would spend the day writing or reading with CNN Headline News on in the background.

Whenever the local news comes on and they say "Breaking News" Ryan always says, "It's either a house fire, a car accident, or a shooting." He's usually right. There is rarely ever breaking news that a child was cured of cancer or that a father of 4 finally returned home after a 15 month tour of Iraq.

There are chilling mugshots of murderers flashed on the screen. (Have you seen the mugshot of the alleged shooter of Rep. Gabrielle Giffords? That smirk, those eyes- it's pure evil.) There are stories of people losing their homes to fires or natural disasters, getting scammed, abusing animals, killing infants, abusing children and elderly folk. There are stories of wars, bombings, big companies screwing over common people. It makes me wonder why news shows are still on. Why do people keep turning on their TV sets to see these sad stories? It makes me think we are on the verge of the end of the world. I know there is evil in this world, but it just seems like that is all the news reports.

So why do Ryan and I watch it? Mostly for the weather and sports. Plus we live out in the sticks, so we like to know what is going on in the world. I also like hearing the heart-warming human interest stories. They give me some hope for humanity!

Maybe I will stop watching the news and stick to getting my info from the Internet- at least I can skip the headlines that will give me nightmares.

Do you watch the news or do you stay away? What do you think of all the sadness?

Check Out These Other Posts!

I'm beginning to see a recurring theme in my blog posts: I'm too tired to write anything worth reading. I have about 50 ideas bumping around in my head but when it comes to typing them out they seem to fade away and I can't come up with the right words.

I suppose I have a good excuse- I am 35 weeks preggo and fighting off an annoying cold. This weekend I had two wonderful baby showers and my nieces came to visit. I had such an awesome time with family and friends, but it took a lot of energy out of me and I feel like I'm still recuperating.

So today I will point you to some more worthy posts to read. I doubt I'll have time to do my Wondering Wednesday post tomorrow since I will be out of town. I promise I'll have something profound to write about soon!

Meanwhile check out these:

My brother at Roman Catholic Cop wrote a great post about being living sanctuaries. It gave me Holy Ghost goosebumps!

Matthew Archbold has a heart warming post about a couple taking into their home a young woman with cerebral palsy. (Thank you, Matthew, for the warning to grab some tissues. This preggo lady who cries at cat food commercials needed them!)

Check out this hilarious video on Danielle Bean's blog, and this one she posted on Faith and Family Live.

I hope you enjoy these posts as much as I do!

100 Random Facts

I'm too tired to write anything profound. I've pretty much reverted to this:




I'm going to follow Kate Wicker's lead and write 100 random facts about myself. Thrilling, I know. Actually, I've noticed some bloggers doing this when they reach the milestone of writing their 100th post, but I forgot! I believe this post will be #126.



So here I go. Hope I don't bore you too much!

1. When I was little, I used to sleep at the very edge of my tiny twin bed so my guardian angel would have enough room to sleep by me.


2. I have 2 tattoos and I don't regret them one bit. One is a butterfly on my heel. The other is a Chinese symbol on my back that means "love." It probably actually means "stinky toilet brush licker" but we'll just pretend it means love, shall we?


3. Before my spiritual growth spurt, I had my nose and belly button pierced. When my mom discovered my nose piercing she just shrugged her shoulders, shook her head and said, "Nothing surprises me anymore..."


4. I learned my letters by watching "Wheel of Fortune." Don't laugh! I never went to preschool or Headstart and I was one of the first of my age group to learn to read!


5. Because of my love of "Wheel of Fortune" I frequently imitated Vanna White when I was little.


6. I also imitated Mary Lou Retton and the Blessed Virgin Mary. I couldn't decide between a leotard or rosary beads.


7. We lived across the street from the Catholic Church and whenever I saw the nuns in their habits walk into the church I would yell out to mom, "Look, it's the Virgin Mary!"


8. I have to have my toe nails painted at all times. Even in winter.


9. The first song Ryan and I danced to as a married couple was "Forever" by the Beach Boys.


10. I played alto clarinet in high school band, piano in jazz band and was part of the color guard in marching band.


11. My favorite Harry Potter characters are Ginny, Snape and Neville.


12. My favorite Harry Potter book is Harry Potter and the Half-blood Prince.


13. I almost went skydiving once but couldn't because of the weather.


14. I've never been in an airplane, so my first time up would have involved me jumping out in midair!


15. The reason I hate butter is because my babysitter wouldn't let me leave the dinner table until I ate EVERYTHING and she always served a piece of bread with butter on it. I didn't like butter then, but I would have to force myself to eat the whole thing and gag over and over if I wanted to go play with my friends who were having fun. I know it was just a small piece of bread but it might as well been as big as a pizza box!


16. I giggle at words like poopie and toot. I swear I have a 14 year old boy living inside me.


17. My husband has turned me into a geek. I love comic books, Star Wars, TRON, sports statistics and history, video games... He mentioned how badly he wanted to go to Comic-Con and I secretly wish that we COULD go someday. OK... so maybe I always was a geek and he just brought me out of my shell....


18. My greatest hero is my big brother, even though he annoys the crap out of me 90% of the time. :-)


19. I can wiggle my ears.


20. The only leftovers I like are Thanksgiving leftovers.


21. I know Easter is the most important holiday. I totally get that. But my favorite holiday is still Christmas.


22. My favorite Disney princess is Belle.


23. That also means my favorite Disney movie is Beauty and the Beast.


24. My confirmation saint is St. Cecilia- patron saint of music.


25. I found out I was pregnant on January 1st. What a wonderful way to start the new year!


26. The reason our first child- our angel baby, is named Gus is because we found out about the miscarriage on August 28th- the feast day of St. Augustine of Hippo.


27. I used to hate roller coasters when I was little. Now I LOVE them!


28. I call it pop, not soda.


29. My favorite pop is Mr. Pibb.


30. I am convinced the baby will come 2 days early- on the Kansas City Chief's home opener!


31. I learned how to swing dance in high school and I loved it. I hope to take more lessons again someday!


32. My favorite season of the year is fall.


33. I have recurring nightmares of Jurassic Park.


34. My favorite books growing up were Babysitter's Club and Little House on the Prairie.


35. I wish I had a clothes line to hang up our clothes.


36. I never liked boy bands like Backstreet Boys or N'Sync while I was a teen.


37. My career goals as a child were: Olympic swimmer, Olympic gymnast, teacher and actress.


38. I quit my first college hoping to start an acting career. Well, that was just one of many reasons I quit!


39. To start off my acting career I auditioned for the Broadway musical The Lion King.


40. I was practically laughed out of the audition.


41. That was the end of my pursuit as an actress.


42. I'm still glad I auditioned, though. It was definitely a once in a life time experience!


43. I thought about trying out for American Idol a couple summers ago but never got around to it.


44. I snort when I am laughing really hard.


45. When I was about 5 or 6 I had a cat named Demi. One day Demi ran away. I sat on the front porch with a bowl of food waiting for him to return. He never did.


46. When I was about 13 I found out at my niece's birthday party that Demi never ran away. He died under my brother's bed and they never told me the truth!


47. When I was little I begged Santa for a Barbie car- the kind you can actually drive in.


48. I did get a Barbie car that Christmas- for my Barbies to ride it, not me. Santa must have misunderstood.


49. I have vowed since then that my future daughter WILL have a Barbie car she can drive.


50. I once scored the winning point during a Jr. High volleyball tournament.


51. I played shortstop and catcher in elementary softball.


52. I had an imaginary friend named Tony.


53. My greatest fear is driving off a bridge into a large body of water.


54. I was a lifeguard for a couple years in high school.


55. I won a dance contest at my senior prom.


56. My favorite color is green.


57. My first car was a 1988 (?) Plymouth Horizon. It had no power steering and the front windshield washer fluid would sometimes squirt over the car to the back window.


58. I have green eyes, but they change color depending on my mood. My husband says they change to blue when I'm mad. He would certainly know!


59. Mom was right- I regret quitting piano lessons.


60. I wanted to backpack through Europe. I had big dreams.


61. In high school we had to write down our goals after we graduated. Mine was to become a pediatrician, move to New York for a couple years, move back home, get married and have 5-7 children.


62. I have been life flighted- kind of. I played a part in a docu-drama of a drunk driving accident.


63. I have never been east of Jefferson City, MO.


64. As a child I was deathly afraid of thunderstorms, the wind blowing and fireworks. I mean, it was so bad my mom thought I had problems.


65. I now love thunderstorms!


66. I have dyed my hair so many times I am not quite sure of my natural color!


67. My best friend and I have been best friends since 5th grade.


68. She called to ask if I was going to join basketball.


69. We ended up talking for hours underneath our dining room tables.


70. I have a potty mouth.


71. I have never had surgery or a broken bone.


72. Well, I have had a broken pinky finger because once Ryan was tickling me, so when I punched him he held up his elbow in defense and I punched that and broke my pinky.


73. In 4th grade I insisted on being called Margaret.


74. That lasted about 3 days.


75. I am named Margaret Amy because I was born on my grandmother's birthday and her name is also Margaret Amy.


76. I used to ghost hunt in high school.


77. That basically means my friends and I explored abandoned houses and cemeteries.


78. We never provoked any spirits and always prayed before and after just to be on the safe side.


79. My friends and I once tried cow tipping. However, when we were climbing the fence to get to the cows, someone accidentally tapped the feed bucket and about 30 cows started coming at us at a fast rate of speed. There's nothing like shining your flashlight and seeing 30 dark objects coming at you with green glowing eyes. We hauled out of there quickly. I think that's God's way of telling us, "Don't be dumb."


80. I'm not much of a cook, but I do love to bake.


81. I used to have a huge gap between my two front teeth, but they grew together naturally- no braces needed!


82. I wanted to play the flute in high school but was told my fingers were too short.


83. Writing is one of my passions.


84. I have tons of stories that I wrote as a little kid, but I never got around to finish them.


85. One was about a rich girl whose parents ignored her. She was cast overboard a cruise ship and someone found her. I can't remember how the rest of it was supposed to go.


86. I have always hated the movie Grease. Sandy has to change her whole self- both inside and out for her greaser boyfriend. I don't think Danny should have tried to change himself either. If they truly loved each other they would have accepted each other for who they were!


87. However, I still like the songs from the musical...


88. I was a cheerleader in high school.


89. My favorite sport to watch is football.


90. I threw the discus my senior year of high school. Just for fun.


91. I used to work at a hospital. I did laundry and did general housekeeping.


92. I talk to my mom pretty much everyday on the phone. If I don't, something just doesn't feel right.


93. My mom is one of my best friends, which is funny because we were mortal enemies when I was in high school. (At least from my perspective!)


94. I have a birthmark on my upper right arm. It's a little larger than a quarter and it's a bunch of big dark freckles all clustered together.


95. I've never had the chicken pox.


96. I have seen every episode of Friends at least 3 times.


97. I'm Team Edward.


98. There was one Thanksgiving we celebrated at my uncle's house. When one of my cousins asked how I liked Kindergarten I said, "It sucks!" I learned that language from my brother.


99. My weirdest pregnancy craving has been corn dogs.


100. I could eat a whole plate of deviled eggs.

Wow. That was a lot harder than I thought! I hope you enjoyed these random tidbits!

I'm Back! (For a few days, anyway)

Oh my.

I. am. tired.

This past weekend, thanks to our wonderful parents, we got the rest of our belongings out of our apartment. I have no idea how we accumulated so much stuff in that tiny apartment, but it seemed the more stuff we hauled away, another corner of random items would appear!

Guess what pregnancy "symptom" has kicked in? NESTING! And nesting while you are unpacking and setting up a home is TOUGH. I have huge bursts of energy to get everything in its place, but when there are boxes and boxes and boxes to unpack, a cockroach problem (which means I vacuumed out and sanitized every single cabinet in the kitchen- beyond DISGUSTING!), and cleaning to do, all while 7 months pregnant- well, let's just say my feet looked like bricks with toes attached and my body ached more than it ever has in this pregnancy. I've worked hard, and so far our kitchen, bathroom and bedroom and completely set up and clean. It's coming together nicely!

Today we went over to our apartment to pick up a few cleaning supplies and recheck to make sure we hadn't left anything behind. When we left I got really sad. Despite my rather annoying neighbors, I loved that apartment. It was our first home as a married couple. Where we spent our first Christmas. It was where we conceived and lost our baby Gus. It was where we found out we are expecting our baby boy. I learned to cook in that apartment and it was where I learned to become a homemaker. So many wonderful memories. I know that "home is where the heart is" and I shouldn't be attached to material things. Soon, when we get this house set up we'll be making new memories!

***************

I had my 30 week doctor's appointment today. I passed my glucose tolerance test and my blood pressure is perfect! He measured my belly and he says that our baby boy is measuring nicely. I told him I was afraid I would have a 12 lb. baby. He then informed me that I would probably have an 8 lb baby! Both Ryan and I were tiny babies, so I was thinking we would conceive a tiny baby as well. I am so naive that I was even thinking that since I'm shorter, that my uterus wouldn't allow for a big baby! (Wishful thinking... I know...) But our baby boy is looking healthy and I am healthy (although I feel like a giant half of the time) so that is wonderful! 10 weeks to go... wow....

Now I have to do the finish touches on plans for our family reunion that takes place this weekend. Soo... I will be taking another bloggy break while I enjoy spending time with family!

A Way to Open the Living Room Blinds.... Slowly

Maybe since I'm unemployed I should start on a contraption like this. I wonder if my future son will tinker around like these geeks!

Click here!

Kate Gosselin

Last Tuesday Kate Gosselin was voted off Dancing With the Stars. I'll have to admit I was very much relieved, because watching her dance the Paso Doble was like watching a drunk cat walking on stilts. Plus, I was tired of her weekly sob-fest and her dashing partner Tony Dovolani standing there looking all uncomfortable while she lamented over the latest drama in her life.

But through the cringing and rolling of my eyes, I still felt sorry for her.

I used to love watching the show where Kate made her debut, Jon & Kate Plus Eight. There were critics of her and her husband from the very beginning, accusing them of exploiting their kids for money. I understood their accusations, but my love for big families and my own dreams of being a stay at home mommy with my own brood of kids won out, so I watched the show.

I admired how they refused to abort any of their children even though there were serious medical risks to carrying and delivering six children, not to mention the financial strain. They weren't afraid to proclaim they were Christian, even though the channel that produced the show, TLC, didn't showcase that part of their life.

I cherished the episodes where Jon and Kate took their children to the pumpkin patch and to the zoo. When I saw the episodes of potty training adventures, Kate cooking soups and stews to freeze for the winter, their grocery shopping trips to Sam's Club and their cookie baking fiascoes during Christmas, my heart swelled, because I couldn't wait to do that with my own family someday. When Kate and Jon took their children to their hometown 4th of July parade and a family barbecue I was already picturing what cute little red, white and blue outfits I could dress my own kids in.

Sure, there were the not so glamorous parts of the show- Kate losing her temper with her kids and she and Jon bickering while being interviewed. I figured that's just how life goes when you have eight kids under the age of seven. All mom's lose their cool every once in awhile, right? Spouses get on each other's nerves sometimes, and I figured that was the case with Jon and Kate. (Although much later we learn that wasn't really the case with these two.)

I enjoyed the show because a majority of what I saw was the reality I dreamed for myself. Yes, the Gosselin family was unique because Kate had twin girls, then a set of sextuplets. But for the most part, the show seemed like the typical life of a family with lots of kids and a stay at home mom. Kate didn't always look so put-together, but her sweat pants with the disheveled-hair-look made me admire her. They lived in a modest-looking home, had a strict budget and faced the same challenges other parents do (the potty training, the chore charts, the sickness that hops from child to child.)

However, much to my dismay, I saw the show evolving to something not so pretty. Jon and Kate were getting their teeth whitened together. OK, maybe some married couples do that, but most people I know consider getting their pearly whites even whiter a very extravagant expense. Then they started getting free ski/spa trips to Utah. I thought, "OK, so that's a perk of the show" but it still didn't seem right.

Kate started to change as well. Soon the sweatpants were off, replaced with mini jean skirts, bikini's and chunky heels. She started to tan and soon was sporting some nice French manicured digits. There is nothing wrong with a woman embracing her feminine side and wanting to look nice, but she was starting to look like a 22 year old sorority girl instead of a down-to-earth stay at home mom.

Then they moved into their multi-million dollar home and things really began to change. Suddenly this "reality" show didn't seem like reality anymore. Do other regular families get Emeril Lagasse to come cook for them? Do other mom's have to worry about the paparazzi snapping pictures of her and her children as they go to the grocery store, therefore hires a bodyguard? I don't think so.

Then the dirty laundry started to be aired. Jon and Kate weren't being interviewed together anymore. Jon started sporting some rediculous diamond studs in his ears and had a custom-made motorcycle created for him. The tabloids started coming out all over the place and it was obvious their marriage was falling apart.

I started having issues with the show I once loved. I thought since they were going through a tumultuous time in their marriage it was time to shut off the cameras and work on their problems in private. Well that didn't happen. They got a separation, announced it on television and the media circus really began.

Jon became a person I lost all respect for. There are a bunch of names I could call him, but I want this blog to remain a Christian-type blog, so I will refrain for now.

Soon all the attention went to Kate. That's when I really, really felt sorry for her. Here she has lost the love of her life and the father of her children. Her own brother and sister in law, who had been featured on the show, suddenly came out and claimed Kate cheated on Jon and some other bogus claims. She had to face the cruel world essentially by herself.

This is when I was really hoping she would turn away from the spotlight completely and focus on regrouping herself and her kids. This was a crucial time to get her priorities straight and set goals for the future. Divorce isn't easy for anybody, but it has to be even harder when all those private details are suddenly made public.

But then came the People magazine cover stories. "It Feels Like I Failed" was one of the titles, I believe. It seemed like every other week she was on The Today Show, or Good Morning America, or *shudders/gags* Entertainment Tonight. Then came The Joy Behar Show and Larry King Live. And then another People magazine article shows up about her new hair extensions.

The crowning jewel of Kate Gosselin's latest schedule: Dancing with the Stars. I've already written about how I felt about that.

But here's where I get conflicted. Kate claims she does all this publicity to make money for her children. It kills her to be away from her children, but she has to pay the bills. It seems that Jon isn't doing much to help her out financially. Doing all this celebrity-type stuff seems like an easy way to make significant amounts of cash, but at what cost?

Leaving her children with nannies and babysitters can't be affecting her children in a positive way. Someday her children will be old enough to be able to see her interviews and read her articles. Hopefully they see her fierce love for them, instead of what looks like a woman possibly addicted to fame.

Does she really need all that money? Does she need those hair extensions, the tanning, the super nice clothes? Does she still need that multi-million dollar home, the bodyguard, the team of nannies? Yes, it does cost money to raise a big family, but I know of many large families that have gotten by happily, and they aren't guest co-hosting with Mary Hart.

I just pray she finds another way of supporting her children instead of jet-setting across America. I can't imagine the predicament she is in, but surely there is a reasonable solution out there. When I say "pray", I mean it. I do pray for Kate Gosselin and other celebrities. Lord knows they all need it BIG TIME!

Well, that's about all I have to say about that subject. Why did I contribute to the many other blog posts out there about Kate Gosselin? Because my preggo hormones are making it hard for me to sleep, then all these strange thoughts pop into my head (like Kate Gosselin's predicament) and I have an itch to write them down!

A Boring Monday...

Sorry folks, there's not going to be a creative, witty or insightful blog post today. My creative juices just aren't flowing. But one of my goals for blogging is to be a bit more brave and do some Catholic apologetics and talk more about my beliefs of Natural Family Planning and birth control.

But that's for another day.

My husband is in Denver, CO. He went to see the Chiefs/Broncos game. He must be good luck because Kansas City STOMPED Denver! I'm not jealous that I didn't get to go. Nope. Not at all...

I came back to my mom's house for the past couple of days because I didn't want to be bored to death in Waverly all by myself. That meant I had to leave Chandler at Ryan's parents house. Miss Kitty still lives at home with Mom and well....the whole things about cats and dogs not getting along is VERY true with Chandler and Kitty! So I'm missing both of my boys!

It's been nice hanging out with my mom. We've laughed a lot watching old family videos and looking through my boxes from elementary and high school. Plus she made chocolate chip cookies...YES!!!

Another perk of coming to my hometown is that I get to go out to lunch with my best friend tomorrow. We rarely get to see each other, but we have one of those friendships that we can go months without seeing each other, but once we do, it's like no distance or time have separated us. Now if only another best friend of mine lived in Tarkio instead of 30 miles away that would be spectacular!

To spare you from being bored stiff at this post, I'm going to use Danielle Bean's "Daybook" idea. Hopefully this "short" post doesn't turn into a lengthy read! (It's been known to happen...)

Outside my window ... SNOW, SNOW, and MORE SNOW! Like I've said before, I love the first snow of the year and snow at Christmas. Of course the snow at THIS Christmas cancelled Mass, so I'm holding a bit of a grudge at the cold white stuff out there!

I am thinking ... I'd love to live in a small town like my hometown. I just don't think it'll happen...

I am thankful for ... my mother. She has done so much for me. I'm glad we've become better friends now that I'm out of my wicked bratty teenage years!

I am hoping ... that Ryan and his friends leave a little earlier from Colorado than they plan. I want to see my husband!!!

On my mind ... I need to jump full force into this looking for a job thing. Ugh...I'm getting anxiety just thinking about it. Maybe I'll go work at McDonalds. They are always hiring....

Noticing that ... while reading my diaries from high school I thought I knew it all. I mean seriously. Looking back now I laugh hysterically!

A few plans for the week ... get my husband and doggie in Kansas City tomorrow and job searching. Also bake some cookies for my neighbors like I was supposed to for Christmas but ran out of time. It's never too late for cookies right? :-)

From the kitchen ... mom baked tons of cookies. For breakfast I could have had a banana...but....... the cookies were right there next to them!

One of my favorite things ... last night I prayed the last day of my 54 Day Novena. The rosary is now one of my favorite things. It has helped me tremendously. Meditating with Jesus and Mary....doesn't get much sweeter!

A picture I am sharing ... while looking through my boxes at mom's I found this picture my big brother and I took at World's Of Fun in Kansas City in 1995. Jamie looks pretty handsome! I look like a ragamuffin!

On Being Lonely

Last night I was talking to an old friend. I could tell he was in a bummed-out mood. When I asked him what was bothering him he told me he was tired of coming home from work at night and watching TV by himself. He felt lonely.

I knew exactly what he was talking about. Lately I've been throwing pity parties for myself because Ryan has been working his 4:00-midnight shifts again, and I have felt very lonely. I eat supper by myself, usually something less than nutritious like spaghetti-o's or a bowl of cereal. I watch my TV shows by myself, read interesting Internet articles and wish he was there so I could share them with him and say my nightly prayers by myself. I think what makes it worse is that with being unemployed I have no co-workers to spend time with. Ryan and my dog are my only companions these days. While we are friendly with our neighbors we don't really hang out with them, and they are the only people we know in this tiny town.

Being lonely is something I've struggled with for a long time. Even though I have an older brother, he is so much older that he was out of the house by the time I hit kindergarten. I was basically raised as an only child. Sure I didn't have to share a room or my toys with siblings, but I always longed for a brother or sister my age. My mom worked long hours and sometimes I was left at home by myself. I had many friends and I hung out with them quite a bit, so it wasn't like I was some poor little girl left out of all the fun. But every once in awhile my friends would have other plans with their family and I was all by myself. I'd throw pity parties for me even back then. I even wrote in one of my diaries that I wanted to "have a bunch of kids so I won't ever feel alone." Thankfully my attitude has shifted- I still want to have a lot of kids, but not to quell my feelings of loneliness.

I worked at a nursing home for short while a couple years ago. My heart would ache for my elderly patients that had no visitors. They would sit in their rooms and watch TV or read a book. I would try to imagine what their lives had been like years before. Did they used to have a bunch of kids running around? Did they have a church group or club they once belonged to where every week they were surrounded by their companions? I would try my best to spend extra time with those folks who had no visitors but then a call light would go off and I'd have to tend to somebody else. I'd try not to look at their disappointed faces when I left their room.

Not all loneliness is bad. When I first moved to Atchison I didn't know anybody. I'd get ready for work in the morning, work eight hours, then come back home. I'd eat supper by myself and watch TV. I was happy during these alone times because it made me reflect on what I wanted to do with my life. I had time to pray, meditate and shift my focus from myself to God. I was better able to hear God speak to me. I cherished these times. Sometimes we need to step back from our social circles and regroup.

We read in Scripture that God said, "It is not good for man to be alone." (Gen. 2:18) We are social creatures by nature. I know that is true for me because my favorite memories involve times where a bunch of people were around: a family reunion, a Christmas morning, a pep rally in high school, a slumber party with friends, my own wedding.

But what about those who are alone not by choice? Those folks in the nursing home. A widow who had no children of her own. A thirty-something male who wants true companionship and not always a rowdy drunk group of friends? This time of year can be especially hard for them.

I complain a lot about being lonely, but I actually have it pretty good. I really should not be complaining at all. I have a husband that comes home to me. This Christmas I will be at my mother's house with my brother and his family PLUS I get another Christmas with my husband's family. It's time to end my pity party and start praying for those who are truly alone.

When I feel alone I should give thanks that I am not truly alone. I have family and friends, and although they live far away they are still a part of my life. I am a part of the body of Christ, there are dear friends and even strangers praying for me.

Let's pray for those who are truly lonely. Let's visit them when we can. Let's give them words of encouragement. Let's bring the light of Christ to them.

In the Words of Stephanie Tanner: "How Rude!"

So I know everyone is blogging, twittering, facebooking, gossiping, etc. about last night's incident at the MTV Video Music Awards involving Taylor Swift, Kanye West and Beyonce. I already had in mind what my second blog posting was going to be about, and I really didn't want my writings to enter into the messed up world of celebrity gossip.

I'm not going to focus on the details of what people are upset about regarding last night's actions. I just want to ask this question: has our country forgotten the rules of politeness and civility?

Less than a week ago South Carolina Rep. Joe Wilson displayed behavior that was less than polite during President Obama's congressional address. Again, I'm not going to go into the details of what was behind the outburst.

Kanye West and Joe Wilson are entitled to their own opinion. With the freedom and liberties granted by our nation they are even entitled to express their opinion. However, there is a difference in expressing a belief in a dignified manner and straight up being rude about it. Both men could have expressed their reasons for being upset in another outlet and in a more civilized way. I know the world of politics and the world of celebrities are not really the same (except in the way that they are both screwed up!)

What about the rest of us? I'm sure we're all faced with rude people everyday. The world is filled with mean-spirited people. I used to work at Wal-Mart so I have seen the epitome of rudeness. I've experienced it at a Royals baseball game when some very rowdy and obnoxious people behind us wouldn't calm down after we politely asked them to. Instead they got in our face and started mouthing off. I was SEETHING mad and had so many non-civil words and phrases running through my head that I wanted to spew out. But my mom taught me something that has stuck with me: "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all." I was mad at myself for not saying something, but we dealt with it in a better manner than continuing to have a yelling match. The High Road isn't so bad.

Emotions can run rampant in us which I believe is a reason for rudeness. It's kind of sad that we sometimes become slaves to our emotions, don't you think? And as much as we have dealt with rude people, we have all been rude ourselves. I know a time or two when I've been tired and grumpy and I've said "Excuse me!" in an exasperated tone to that lady who seems to be purposely blocking the frozen pizza aisle.

How do we stop rudeness? HA! I've been accused of having a "Pollyanna outlook on life" and perhaps I do have too much of the attitude of "can't we all just get along?" However, I'm going to throw it out there- "Love thy neighbor as thyself" Call it what you will: the ethic of reciprocity, the Golden Rule, the Great Commandment, but I think if we did treat others the way we wanted to be treated life would be a tad bit happier, more peaceful. It is not always easy, but that's where self-control and self-discipline come into play.

I'm watching CNN and they are talking about people being rude, so I guess I'm not alone!

The First One

So here I go- my first blogging experience. I'm having trouble deciding what my blogging premier should be about. Should I do the detailed "About Me" or write about my past; maybe I should write about my "conversion" story.

But I will save those for another day.

I guess I should start out by writing about why I even want to start a blog. I used to think blogs were a nice outlet for writing, but I never had the motivation to start reading a blog. That was until my brother started a blog earlier this year. It's mostly a Catholic apologetic blog mixed with his perusings of his spirital journey. I love reading it and have actually found it to be a form of spiritual devotion for me. (I never thought I'd say that about my dorky big brother!) Here's a link to his blog: http://www.romancatholiccop.com/

I suggest reading if you ever have questions about why the heck Catholics do all the crazy things we do. Warning: my brother's sarcasm can be found within these holy posts!

So what do I want to accomplish with my blog? Yes, I want to focus on my spirituality, but also my adventures as a newlywed, being a recent college grad with NO job, my family, friends and my life experiences. I will be explaining and defending my beliefs on here, but explaining in a way of how I came to understand these beliefs- and most of these ways were through some good and some not so good life lessons.

But because I am a totally random person I don't think every post will be focused on spirituality. I already have a blog planned about my beagle doggie Chandler and my attempts at cooking! But God is interwoven into every part of my life that He's bound to creep in these blogs often (especially with cooking- I always pray to God I don't burn down the apartment!)

I had a difficult time trying to decide what to name my blog. I had a lot of people give awesome suggestions, but I finally picked the title "From the Heart." I was going to go the snazzy Latin way and name it "ex animo" which means "from the heart- sincerely" but decided to keep it simple. But that's why there's a E and an A before fromtheheart.com because it was VERY hard to find a web address that wasn't already taken!

Hopefully my blogs will entertain you, intrigue you and help you in your spiritual life or just plain ol' every day life.

So here I go- writing from my heart...