My Darling Husband

It's a lovely fall day. The sun is finally shining, the Chiefs are playing (albeit losing as usual) (UPDATE: The Chiefs actually won! WOO HOO!!!); I have an apple cinnamon candle burning and a pot roast and vegetables warming in a crock pot. The best part of it all- my husband doesn't have to work today and we get to celebrate our six month anniversary. No flowers or cards were given and we do realize that not many people "celebrate" their six month mark. But today is a special day.

Ryan and I met in January of 2006 at my first ever college class at Benedictine- speech class. I remember Ryan walking into the classroom. He was wearing a Chiefs hoodie, a Chiefs hat and carrying a Dr. Pepper can with a zombie-look on his face. (I could tell right then and there he was NOT a morning person!) He was pretty cute especially since he was wearing Chiefs stuff. After I gave a speech about my brother being a cop in Kansas City he came up to me after class and mentioned that he had two uncles that also worked for KCPD. Our friendship budded from there.

We practiced our speeches together, complained about our relationships, made random trips to Wal-Mart and Sonic and chatted before another class in the hallways of the Admin building.

We started dating in October of that same year. That was such a fun time. We'd hang out in his dorm room and watch movies and funny You Tube videos. We'd do our homework together and run to McDonalds (or Sonic, or Taco Bell, or Dairy Queen) for a break.

This may sound weird but one of the funnest parts of our relationship was when his little brother Conor came to hang out with us. We'd talk sports, the Office, movies. Many laughs were involved. In fact it was Conor who took me out to a movie before Ryan ever did!

When I met his family they were so welcoming and loving. I loved getting in the car with Conor and Ryan and travel to Kansas City. Ryan has such a close-knit family and I always hoped that I would someday be a part of it.

The fall semester of 2007 was insanely crazy. I was taking 19 credit hours, my grandfather had passed away and I was doing some observing/student teaching for one of my education minor classes. I had papers galore that were due, projects for my 4th graders to be done and was still catching up on homework that I had missed during Grandpa Joe's funeral. One week was particularly crazy and Ryan decided that Friday we would see a movie in Kansas City. Before we left he wanted to take me to a place he had driven by when he did his internship with the sheriff's department. It was a place called State Lake and he thought I'd like it.

I took my camera to take some pictures of the beautiful fall leaves around the lake. Ryan pointed out a particular spot to take a picture. I snapped the pic and turned around and there was Ryan- down on one knee with a ring box. I was in pure shock. We had talked about marriage even when we were just friends. I knew we'd get married, but after the incredibly stressful week I had gone through, getting engaged was not on my mind! (He had to ask my twice because I was speechless!)

The following is a note I posted on Facebook very shortly before my wedding:

I'm getting married in 48 days.

Holy crap.


I've had most of this wedding planned since I was in 5th grade. Ashlee (my maid of honor) and I would dream up what colors to use, who the bridesmaids would be and print out fake wedding programs. The only missing piece of the plan was the groom.

I thought wedding planning would be fun, and most of it has been. A friend of mine told me that if he and his wife would do their wedding all over, they would have eloped. I thought, "Nah, that won't be me." Boy was I wrong. I have people coming at me from all directions saying I need to do this, I need to play this, I need to order this, I need to book this, I need to decide this...AHHH! I want the wedding in the Church- that comes with rules I am ready to accept. I want all of my family and friends to be there- that comes with a large guest list which I gladly accept. But it's all those nitty gritty details that people are shoving down my throat. I am that type of girl who has a "it'll all work out great in the end" attitude. I refuse to be the bridezilla who has every detail planned to a tee and if the plan gets out of wack then I become a fireball of fury. It's getting to the point that I can't wait until this day is over with. It shouldn't be like that.

I also am losing sight of what this day is about. I'm marrying the perfect man for me. I can't believe I get so focused on the DAY and not the MAN I am marrying.

The man I am marrying was my best guy friend before we dated. We talked about everything ranging from old loves to the Chiefs. We had fun going to Sonic, browsing Wal Mart and practising our speeches for speech class together.

The man I am marrying makes me laugh. He can say the most random thing and I'll laugh until I cry. We have so many inside jokes that people would think we're crazy at what we laugh at.

The man I am marrying takes care of me. When I'm sick he bends over backwards to make sure I'm comfortable, runs out to Wal-Mart for soup and 7-UP at 2:00 a.m. and takes me to the E.R. even when I refuse to go, because he knows I am very very sick. He holds my hand when they poke me 100 times at the ER for an IV even though he can't stand needles. He also laughs at me whenever the morphine kicks in.

The man I am marrying encourages me when I'm down. When I have three 15-page papers due at the same time and my normally sweet disposition (HA!) is changed to a super brat, he pops in a Robot Chicken or a Full House or Friends episode in the DVD player because he knows that's just the ticket to get me to calm down, de-stress and re-focus.

The man I am marrying asked my mother's permission to date me and to marry me. That's old school. Some people scoffed at that when I told them that's what he did. Yeah that's old school- but it's also very respectful and honorable.

The man I am marrying wants me to get to heaven. He wants Christ to be an active part in our relationship. He used to go to Mass and confession because I kind of forcefully suggested he go, but now he does these things because he wants to. He does them because he loves God and wants to better himself for the Kingdom of Heaven. He wants me and him to spend eternity together with God and the angels.

The man I am marrying loves me for me. I know I can be a spoiled, self-centered brat. There have been times I have not been good to my family and friends... and to him. I can be a drama queen, loud, obnoxious and crazy. But he loves me and wants to spend the rest of his life with me. (Something my mother can't quite wrap her head around...lol.)

So now when it comes to what color ribbon to get for the napkins, what song will be played while I walk down the aisle, who will sit where...those things aren't important. I'm beginning a marriage. God willing Ryan and I will have miniature versions of us running around someday very soon. We're going to grow old together- still watch the Chiefs and dote on our grandchildren.

I can't wait for my wedding day. But I'm more excited about my marriage with Ryan Patrick William Crawford!

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Our wedding was a big one. It was stressful. We could have had a smaller wedding and during the wedding preparations I was beginning to think that perhaps we should have cut down the guest list. But when I was up at that altar looking into the eyes of my beloved, physically feeling the grace of God wash over us, it meant the world to me that my best friends were backing me up as bridesmaids and that all of our family and friends could witness our Sacrament. I wouldn't have changed anything about our wedding day. I know the Sacrament is between Ryan, myself, and God, but it was such a joyous occasion that I wanted everyone there to share in our happiness.

Now it's six months after the wedding. We still joke around and watch You Tube videos. I'm trying to learn how to cook so we can stop depending on Taco Bell for our nourishment. Although we don't hang out with Conor as much as we used to, when we do, it's still full of laughs.

We've had our own heartbreaks and struggles with jobs and finances. But we know that God will take care of us in our time of trouble and need.

There are minor struggles- like when there are little white specks of toothpaste on the bathroom mirror and his chin whiskers are sprinkled around the sink after he shaves. I clean the sink and mirror (and his empty pop cans) and think "I'm on a path to sainthood." However, I am certain there are things I do that drive him nuts as well.

We strive to keep Christ an active part of our relationship. After all, it was through Him that we have our life, our family, our friends...and each other.

Happy anniversary to my best friend, my soul mate. I love you more than words can say.