I mentioned in my last post that my husband received some bad news. He had an interview a couple weeks ago and it turns out he didn't get the job. We were so hoping that this time would be different.
For goodness sakes, he found out about the job from a friend on Christmas night- we thought it was a Christmas miracle! His friend called that night asking if he was still looking for a new job (which of course Ryan said, "YES!") and said there was an opening in his office. We thought Ryan had an "in" but it turns out that it wasn't meant to be.
I had prayed two novenas before this job interview. In my prayers I always requested that the people conducting the interview would make the best possible decision on who to hire and also for us to accept whatever God wills.
Well, I am at a loss for what God wants for us. I've mentioned it before, but I feel like a little kid tugging on God's arm wanting him to talk to me, to tell me what to do, but he's too busy listening to every body else and giving them their own answers to prayers. I'll admit that after I received this news I threw a tantrum. I even got "mad" at the saint I was praying my novena to. Seriously, who gets mad at a saint?! That's probably an extra 52,000 years in Purgatory for me.
What upsets me the most is that I want awesome and good things to happen for my husband. He works so damn hard. He is a good worker and I believe he deserves good things to happen for him. It breaks my heart to see him get passed over for a job opportunity and to see him disappointed and bummed out. I love him so incredibly much. His pain is my pain.
I think I've gotten a little whisper from God on what to do next, but I'm afraid it's just my wild and crazy imagination at work again. I'm afraid I'm setting myself up for disappointment all over again. It is something I will definitely be praying over.
Thank you all for your prayers and kind words from my last post. Sorry I've been so "Woe is me!" lately. Hopefully soon I can get back to my regular spunky self!
15 comments:
I'm sorry, Maggie. I understand you're upset. I pray that God's plan is revealed soon!
Sorry the job did not work out, hugs!!
Prayers for peace and discernment.
It is so frustrating to remain a good and faithful servant when it seems that life only beats you down for further for every 1/2 baby step you take forward.
Do not give up. Keep looking. Keep praying. Hold steady. I will be praying for you both!
I think God understands your frustration...but in His time He has better plans for you both. It's so hard to believe in the moment, but looking back I'm sure you can always see how He provided at exactly the right time. Prayers and hugs!
Is it wrong that I am amused about your getting mad at a saint? I usually just get mad at God. I'm pretty sure that's worse. I hear you, though, on the whole praying and praying and not getting anywhere. I hope you get some answers soon!
Keep us updated...hopefully this new hunch you've got is something wonderful! Praying!!!
I'm sorry your husband did not get the job. It is very tough to keep faith, to believe that God has a plan, to know he cares...but we must continue believing just that! Don't worry about being mad or cranky with saints or even God...they can handle it, and they know it comes from our weaknesses, not our best selves.
Heh heh, God help me, I get mad at him and the saints all the time. I'm so spoiled.
Go ahead and act on that little whisper, and take the opportunity to ask God for the grace to trust, both in this job search and in your discernment of your relationship with him. I know what it's like to lose heart concerning both.
This is one of the very few times that I could actually comment knowingly, but I've no idea what would actually help *you*. I am sorry.
I'm so sorry that Ryan didn't get the job. I know what you mean about how bad it hurts when our husbands hurt. I think, no I know, it is worse for me when Cliff is disappointed than if I am disappointed about something for me.
I too laughed that you got mad at the Saint you were praying to - I could so see myself doing that.
Prayers that your whisper from God is what is supposed to come next. It is so hard when we feel pulled in one direction only to discover that it may not b the right one.
(((Hugs)))
I totally understand where you're coming from when talking about your husband... I have the very same feelings about my husband and his current job situation.
Prayers!
Sorry to hear that! My husband and I have been going through the same thing. It is indeed frustrating, but God always comes through and His plan is better than mine-although I have to agree, it is hard to see that sometimes.
I like to think, when my Novenas aren't answered the way I hoped, that there are many graces and blessings showered down in the form of something I needed and didn't realize it. Keep praying!
Ugh, I was afraid it was something like that. Feel free to be as "woe is me" as you need! Secret: my husband is also job hunting, so I'm right there with you praying for God's will to be done - and can it please coincide with my will? I'll make sure and pray for you all as well!
I'm sorry he didn't get the job. I'm impressed that your prayer was in the right direction though...not just "give me this!" Hopefully soon you will get that peace and acceptance of this outcome...it might just take a little longer.
I can relate to every single word you've just written! I'm so sorry. I know how hard it is. You'll be in my prayers!
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