My Confession Told in Gifs

So I went to confession on Wedneday after 5 difficult months. 

Here's the story. 

For a long time I've been feeling really down in the dumps. 

God has been calling me to confession, but this is pretty much how I've been responding:

You see, every time I think about going to confession I suffer though TONS of anxiety. 

I worry about the silliest things. I worry that I'm taking too long and people waiting in line behind me are getting mad.

So then I finally found a confession time at a parish where the priest didn't know me and where there was no Mass afterward. I felt a small sense of relief.

I was still a super nervous. This was pretty much me while we were in the parking lot:

"Oh my gosh we're too late!" (Confession started at 6:00. It was 5:52.)

"Why aren't there any lights on in the church??!?!?"

"Why are there so many cars??!?!?!?"

"Why are people going to the school instead of the church?!?!?!?"

"Maybe it isn't tonight!!!!"

"What's going on here?!?!?!"

"This is the most horrible thing in the universe!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Bascially I was doing this:

Ryan was all like

So finally I see some other people go into the church. Thankfully the church has a huge foyer and Ryan and the boys stayed there while I went into the church.

I knelt in the pew and was filled with great anxiety. I knew this anxiety was from the devil. I knew I had to tell Satan what's up and to leave me alone. Something like this:

"Get outta here you stinky debbil!"

and

 

 

Bam! GET ON OUTTA HURR!

I felt a little more at ease. 

But then I gazed on the crucifix and was overcome with sadness and guilt. I was still mentally freaking out and my chaotic feelings spilled over in my tears. 

Finally I get the courage to walk into the confessional. 

I'm finally in there. The screen is there. The priest is behind the screen. I can't see his face. I can only hear his voice. I picture Jesus sitting there waiting to hear my confession.


Long story short. I start confessing my sins and this happens.

And some more

Absolution:

And finally, me after I leave the confessional.

I was in there a long time. When I walked out with my beat red, tear streaked face people in line were probably all like

But I didn't care.


It was such a wonderful feeling to let it all out. I felt 100 pound lighter. It was amazing to actually hear the words "You are forgiven."

Ryan went to confession as well and afterward we were like

Jesus doesn't feel like my second cousin anymore. I feel like now that I am right with God I can re-focus on some other areas of my life. I need to get healthier. I need to stop being lazy. I need to rededicate myself to being a good wife and mother.



I feel free. I feel strong. I feel like I can take on anything now, with God's help.

I'll be taking a break from blog land until after Christmas. I hope you all have a very joyous Christmas. There will be stress and chaos, but remember the quiet, peaceful night long ago when God became man in the form of a helpless baby. Remember to keep Jesus in your life.

Merry Christmas!